i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
Maybe he just has a boisterous penis
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
I just heard someone say "gosh-darnit" and they didn't have a southern twang. I worry for New York.
Sonogram pictures belong on a fucking fridge...NOT FACEBOOK!!
She sprinted out of the bathroom and ran all the way into the middle of the street. Five minutes later she came back with a banana nut muffin. She's that kind of drunk.
How the fuck did you end up in a tree? With multiple people?
My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out.
Also. This Ativan makes me feel fearless. I think we need an exciting new hobby for when we take it. How do you feel about ghost hunting?
He took a girl home tonight that he was trying to sell a fridge to. She wanted a fridge and got his dick. He's got a talent.
shes making a cheerios necklace using dental floss 'just in case' she gets the munchies later
You went to the animal party as a hoodrat. You won the most creative costume contest.
She was wearing American flag underwear. How could I NOT fuck her?
You're a true patriot.
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
Why can't they just let me be the gorgeous cum dumpster that I know I'm meant to be?
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