My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
thats the only time ive ever had sloppy firsts
I swear to god he was trying to crawl under my door last night muttering "I'm Alex Mac! I'm Alex Mac!"
I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
Last thing I remember was you straddling a guy in a wheelchair on the dance floor.
Bitches at mcdonalds acting like they never seen a girl puke in her own coat pocket before
It was just a reflex. BOOM I kicked her in the face
I finally fell asleep and like an hour later he wakes me up and says "I've always to be woken up w a blowjob." Um, that's not how it works asshole.
I'm wearing sunglasses around my house. Douchebag status. The hangover is real.
Yeah, nothing like barfing into a grocery bag you just put dog shit into.
Damn it. Can't order pizza. Can't do the hot tub. No one to invite over for loud, kinky sex. What's the point of being here alone?!
i would stab him if he didn't just tell me he is a priest
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
But like, I don't remember getting hit with the door... I just come out from peeing and there was blood running down my face.
Randomize
