At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
he also called and said i only cheated on you 8 times but they were all trannies
and someone in the background yelling "one was fat so that counts as one and a half"
my dad just told me that a lesbian kissed my mom at a bar last year
I need to keep friends like you around just in case hell grades on a curve.
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
whatever. i don't care. i just want to be drunk wrapped in an american flag.
I just passed a drug test. I want to shout that from the top of a mountain. Can we have beers on the top of a mountain?
Happy Birthday. May your liver respect you, fat bitches neglect you, hangovers reject you, and AA accept you.
You are not going to get a pat on the back from me for not fucking that 40 year old again.
I'm going to avoid eye contact because my old high school English teacher is not who I feel like seeing after I just had a dick in my mouth
I've been here 11 months and i just realized i have literally never looked at my apartment/roomates sober
literally who communicates this much post-hookup why r u like this
Where are you? Where am I? Why am I so red?
You know you're out of shape when you're sore after masturbating.
do nipples grow back?
Randomize
