If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
friends with benefits? more like friends with awkward sexual tension
She has a facebook friends list called oops. theres 33 people in it. she said its all the guys she regrets fucking.
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
It got to the point that I had to make flashcards with their name on the front and dick pics on the back.
I feel like I'm taking part in a surprise porno. At least my hair looked good.
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
I just did the math, I've had 8 hours of sleep in the last 3 days. Not sure if that means I am dedicated to my sex life or my job...
Chef at hibachi place learned it was my bday and sprayed 20 second count worth of saki in my mouth. Not sure it was the right image to share with my kids, but thought you'd be proud.
i got a standing ovation for bringing skittles to the party
Bro. Some kids just drive-by judged the shit outta me.
Do you count doing $200 of coke off his dick until 6am as a successful rekindling of our relationship or...
I think this shark week should consist of getting drunk enough to actually go hunt sharks ourselves.
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
