dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
she tasted like a mixture of sweat and destiny
Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
ALL CAPS CUZ ITS SERIOUS SHAME.
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
Not sure if this is better or worse than the discovery that bourbon and hot chocolate is a viable combo
when your 30 and im 37 and we're lonely and single, lets make a pact to murder each other.
You are the only person I have ever seen offer your other drink to the bouncer on two fors night
Bouncers are people too...giant angry people
Ya know what's been the best part of this College Football Season? Not having to hear Brent Musberger say the Honey Badger 77 fucking times.
I don't understand why she gets annoyed by my drunk texts. It means she's who I'm thinking about even when my brain isn't functioning properly.
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
Other than trying to finger me on the couch in the middle of the bar a few times, you were fine.
I successfully navigated a full, lengthy interaction with my dad in which he never asked me if I was freshly baked. 10 points.
Dick is the cure to depression. I'm almost positive. And cough syrup.
Randomize
