your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
wanna get hammered and throw tomatoes at the people standing in line for the midnight showing of harry potter and yell whichcraft is evil
Im going to buy a thermometer. If its above 104 im going to the hospital if its under 104 im going to the bar
Had a guy offer me a shot. But he wimped out when I asked for tequila and instead ordered gummi bear shots. I don't think he has balls. I didn't stick around to find out.
We're shaving superhero symbols into our pubes. I call dibs on Batman.
He sent me a picture of him trying to push his cock into a Gatorade bottle. I dont know if I'm impressed it didn't fit and disgusted that he sent me something so vile.
We drank vodka and koolaid through a traffic cone. It got rowdy.
When he mumbled "I can't feel my legs," proceeded to stand, fall over, and just lay there I knew I'd given great head...
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
He went down on me while i ate a whole 7/11 pizza. New level unlocked
THERE ARE NO EMOJIS TO SHOW MY SEXUAL FRUSTRATION
It's been THREE DAYS. Why do I still have the munchies?!
Man I just realized that my only life problem right now is that I have to convince myself not to fuck a 19-y-o
JUST BECAUSE I ANSWER THE DOOR NAKED CARRYING A BOTTLE OF RUM DOESN'T MEAN YOU CAN STARE NEIGHBORS.
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