make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
While she was crying about breaking up, he looked at her through his fork and said "of course she's upset, she's in jail." Having sex with him tonight.
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
How would I get in touch with Carly Rae Jepsen if I wanted to thank her for the loss of my virginity?
She clicked her fingers, said "here boy!", and pointed at her vagina.
Kristy just reminded me that I have a bottle of champagne to lick off your ass hole...... This is by way of saying that we have plans on Friday.
He was twisted. Literally. It's like God took his dick with a pair of pliers and gave it a half twist to the left.
I had sex for the second time today and ate an entire bag of alligator jerky on the way home. These truly are the golden years.
Who brings a stripper home to ninja turtle bed sheets
Me and I got head
UGH I HATE BEING THIS WAY IM GOING TO GO HUG THE CACTUS YOU GOT ME
Just found out a shooting happened in our parking lot while it was closed this morning. So thaaaaaaaaats fun.
I might be getting fired on this week so the only option i see for tonight is to get smashed and have an orgy. actually this idea might explain why i'm not an ideal employee.
Randomize