Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
At this point it has been so long i wouldnt know what a dick was if it slapped me in the face.
I love college. Only here at ten in the morning can you hear "Man, hot sauce on my pussy was my worst idea in a long time." while walking down the hall.
Good thing it was his birthday because I accidentally grabbed his dick at the bar. A lot.
I was trying to be really smart and save 10 dollars for each cab there and back. ...so I ripped a $20 dollar bill in half.
why didn't you tell me his penis tasted like oreos?
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
I don’t know what's weirder; the fact that I weigh more with an erection..or the fact that I actually weighed myself with an erection...
Yep I can make a seagull sound. It's identical. I tried it. They thought I was talking to them. It's pretty cool.
Too many penises have met your hands. Stop or die.
Boobs have been pretty central in my life somehow lately which makes me question if I am truly gay
I wrote a list of things I enjoy doing. So far it says "get high and go to museums."
I apologize for using the phrase "monster cock hentai porn shit" to describe that guy I picked up last week.
Hey kevin, it's Ashlee. I have been trying to get ahold of you. Your pledge gave me your number. I really wanted to apologize for shitting in your car I'll buy new upholstery or pay to have it shampooed if needed. I'm so embarrassed.
You're a brave, albeit stupid soul for wanting in on the fuckery that comes attached to my vagina
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