Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
I think dad's getting high again. His last google search was "awesome ping pong shit."
The crowing achievement of my life is still the time I made a 3 course meal out of things I found in the dumpster.
Ricky Martin is gay. You owe me $10 from 3rd grade.
shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.
My dad just called from upstairs on the house phone to tell me to bring him a beer. You tell me how I am.
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
I made two strippers play rock paper scissors to see who would give me a lap dance last night
you reached into a lemon drop to pull out a lemon of someone else's drink..
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
My dad just accidentally taught me how to make fake IDs. I love my life.
My house smells like bleach. Also, I do not feel bad about all the stuff I stole from the hospital while I was there.
You are in a fancy European city. The best way to truly experience the city is through Tinder
And then he peed in my hair
At this point, I would not mind getting hit by a truck. It would mean I could get this over with quicker.
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