we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
not only did i manage to get kicked out of the bar, i also got kicked out of denny's. i didnt even know that was possible.
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.
They wouldn't let me go to sleep at the police station while I was waiting to bail u out. YOU OWE ME
Thanks to this cookie, I have now eaten something other than skittles today.
I got arrested for "public intoxication". Fuckers threw me out of the bar into public... i mean shit they have thirsty Thursdays. And I get thrown out for self serve Sundays plus a citation.
I love it. Like, more than my penis at the moment.
He's in a nude suit, bald, with a pink headband and a black sharpie streak down his forehead.
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
I am going to MURDER whoever gave him my phone number but it was probably drunk me so I'm conflicted.
She ripped her shorts off and yelled "VAGINA TIME!"
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
I’m not washing my pussy with handsoap.
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
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