i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
No touching my privates on the ride to school. Pinky swear.
And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
Worst ten minutes of my life, it's was like trying to put a marshmallow in a piggy bank....
I got up before the sun today. That makes me sun for the day.
When did you start smoking in order to be high by 4:30?
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
I look like slutty woodland creatures dress me in the morning. Everybody's got problems.
Our lady landlord called. Dot worry, I handled it. Drunk. Tell her it was Nate. Done. Good. Bye. Drunk.
Please tell me you werent the one who replaced every beer bottle in my fridge with a picture of a baby kitten.
... and if i was..
Fuck. You.
I think that's why god made me a woman. Bc it's harder to slap people in the face with a vagina.
We were banging then all I remember is coming down hard and smashing my top teeth off his forehead. I just rolled off and tapped out. Done-zo
I should stop using "Braveheart would do it" as a basis for decision making...
You can either drink his whiskey or be a bitch. Doing both is just mean.
Randomize