hes a soccer player too.. you'd think he has better penis eye coordination
There are topless girls riding the lawn flamingos. I win.
did you dip my ponytail in franzia? its the only thing i can think of to explain my hair right now.
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
I always hoped that one day I'd have a sex position named in my honor.
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
It was going alright when lo and behold Tom the cock blocking tornado hits. He is the only man I know who doesn't want anyone to fuck girls.
Security has videotape of her blowing the boss against his car. Don't they know he entire parking lot is under video surveillance?
There's times when I need to be plowed... and I'm ashamed to admit auto correct was able to predict that entire sentence.
He was nothing but deer-caught-in-headlight eyes and dick, it was adorable
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
I don't think it's a coincidence that the day I just happen to do the splits at the gym I come back with 7 guys' phone numbers.
my nextdoor neighbor called me saying "um hey, your mom just stumbled into bed with me and my husband, can you please come get her?"
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
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