Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
I dont even clean my room anymore .. i drunk proof it for when i come back smashed with a guy
I've hooked up with 3 different guys already this week...don't tell me I haven't been a productive member of society
he said he has something really important to tell me but isn't ready yet. It's either that he loves me or has herpes
Your dad needs a mid life crisis affair thing, I could totally be that girl.
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
Apparently I blacked out and pissed all over the sliding glass door from the inside, as everyone watched from the outside helplessly....
You have to keep an eye on her tonight cause you know how she likes to pickpocket people when she's drunk.
Is this helping you get pumped up or am I going to have to send you more dick pics?
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
That's totally the Emoji for "just ran into some girl who knows I know she had an abortion"
No but I was fuckin done when I realized my acrylic nail caught fire when I was hitting the bong.
This is a question I thought I'd never have to ask. How many hits of acid did you give your dad tonight?
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
No, it's okay that he's on a date. I attach no more emotion to him than I do my vibrator.
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