So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
Um don't talk to me about fat. I just used my chip bag to cover up all my candy wrappers in the garbage.
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
You hit on my mom and then passed out in the kiddie pool.
She did my hair, then ate me out. Switching teams was an awesome decision.
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
Is it socially acceptable to break up with someone over snapchat?
All I can think about are the cheese it's on my desk at work this morning. Like are those apologetic cheese it's or does he seriously think he still has a shot..
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
Just ignore the penis. It's won't bother you. I promise.
drunk me cartwheeled over a turtle sandbox & slit my foot open on a cinder block. how do you explain that to a doctor?
I'm having shoppers remorse over a dildo
And, by “make you dinner” I mean “have lots of sex and multiple orgasms.” So you should probably eat something and before you come over
And hydrate too
Randomize
