Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
Funny, I didnt know that facebook statuses were for crappy song lyrics
Registered for next semester classes drunk. Let's hope I didn't accidently sign up for history of dinosaurs again...
The stoners next door have their couch on the sidewalk again, shirtless, soaking their feet in a baby pool and listening to loud ukulele music. I want their life.
Just kicked a guy in his penis in order to win a dance contest on Bourbon....desperate.
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
Still not exactly sure how i unbolted your toilet from the ground.
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
Had to belly crawl across the floor to the toilet with my eyes closed to puke my life out without making my hangover worse. Three times.
I was gonna tell her, but there were too many tongues in my mouth
he's definitely still old enough to be your dad. even your grandfather, if you come from a line of juvenile delinquents
You gave my cousin a blowjob and are facebook friends with my mom. Is there a name for this level of friendship?
He said a lot of nice things about me, it was really uncalled for.
While we were doing it he looked up at me and said "Does your husband fuck you this good?" Talk about a mood killer....
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