it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
What did you wear last night? Because I'm pretty sure there are atleast 4 Facebook statuses about your walk of shame.
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
The girl who overdosed in the bathroom at work is back....help?
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
Two questions for you. Did I throw up last night and did we get food or did I dream that..?
No you never threw up but you did force me to take you to wendy's because you wanted "beef and ketchup"
Either I'm tripping balls or my dog has super powers.
Hey, YOU try working out drunk every night! Besides, I think at least one of those bruises is a hickey.
I woke up in your kitchen with my ID in my hand and my nails were painted electric blue. Dude.... never let me have fireball again.
2015 is the year I FINALLY ALMOST had enough dick to satisfy me.
They kept freaking out that you were missing and potentially having sex.. like it was a bad thing. Got fed up with hearing it so i just yelled "ITS HER BIRTHDAY AND SHE CAN FUCK IF SHE WANTS TO!" They gave me unnecessary looks. I thought it was acceptable.
I just opened my travel toothbrush holder and it smelled like vodka...maybe a vodka cranberry. This says a lot about my vacations.
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