And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
this one can actually spell my name, that's a shoe-in
shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.
We decided to go to McDs, but we only had a few minutes to make it to breakfast. We were sprinting full speed ahead when she tripped and you just yelled 'LEAVE HER' and kept your course.
They're doing a Bong-A-Thon for 4/20. I don't care if you quit. You are coming out of your weed retirement for this.
All I remember is that the bartender wouldn't give me scissors cuz I was too drunk
Midnight run for medical supplies ended several hours later with a lapdance to the Braveheart soundtrack.
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
You told me that they girl who was giving you a handjob under the table looked a little like your sister
In case you were wondering how drunk I was last night, there was an unopened slim Jim in front of my door and I ate it.
I will teach you the ways of the ho life, my little gay grasshopper.
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