I'll bet she douches with gravy.
i really did not know you could catch crabs from a sofa until now
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
This house was built for laser tag.
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
She brought up feelings... her days are numbered
Even after projectile vomiting watermelon on the beach, it still sounds appetizing.
I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
Want to go swimsuit shopping? First one who cries buys ice cream.
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
What's the point of bringing a Jack and Coke to work if my boss is just gonna piss and moan about me day drinking again?
It's a shame things ended how they did. We were well on our way to transforming from acquaintances with benefits to friends with benefits.
he'll eat me out, but god forbid we double dip when sharing salsa
Just learned a very valuable life lesson. Never motorboat a cat when they have claws.
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