Please explain to me why I only attract Mormon guys. Just explain that to me.
I think it's God trying to counter your lustful nature. Imagine if Agnostics liked you. You'd never come out of your bedroom.
we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
I have seen more male genitalia at this party tonight than I ever want to see again in my entire life.
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
Yessssssssss. I got taped to a couch last night apparently. I also thought i was close to scoring after talking to some chick about hard boiled eggs
Just drunk tweeted NASA asking them to give me a lift home in one of their spaceships. Fingers crossed
We didn't have a blender so we made the margaritas by running over a garbagebag full of ice with the car and then stirring it with a knife in a French-press coffee pot. CAN YOU SAY RESOURCEFUL?
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
Then, right before he came he said "I want to buy you so many things!" What the fuck?!
she had a dildo shaped like a dolphin. she will forever be known as Flipper
Got stuck at my fwb place for three days because I decided sex was more important than my safety in the weather. Worth it.
Got robbed by an ATM. My weekend officially sucks.
on a scale of one to ten where does vomming from being hungover during a professionalism lecture fit
Guess whose grandma smokes weed?
Randomize
