Way too hungover to be taking this many family pictures
I know it's not your turn to do the dishes, but since they're covered in your puke, it is.
So, Southern Comfort will donate 25 cents for every bottle sold towards Gulf Coast Relief... Can we save the wetlands through my alcoholism?
I'm the only adult here not drinking and their 2 year old daughter is trying to play dolls with me.. I've never been so demoralized in my life.
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
I'll see your cousin, and raise you a sister.
Things I have that belong to you: shorts, headband, bra, purse, chinese food, vodka, and blood on my jeans. Happy homecoming.
I drink way too much to have a type. Last weekend I picked up a guy who calls me "baby girl"
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
So I had sex in a bulldozer lastnight now that's definitely a first...
We're living together and you don't know if I've seen Titanic?!
So apparently it wasn't anything really bad, it's hemorrhoids. Which is the medical word for butthurt. I actually have ass ointment.
I felt like I needed to shower with a Mr. Clean Magic Eraser.
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
Randomize
