I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
i wish that high-me and normal-me were two different ppl so that high-me could thank normal-me for setting out a feast before smoking
I wish that high-you wouldn't text me stupid shit at 3:30 in the morning
I hate drunken dyslexia, i thought she said "someone to do" not "something to do" long story short i now have a restraining order.
We need to stop celebrating holidays that dont belong to us
the last thing i remember is ordering pitchers of white russians....
we're on our way back. she tried to pants the waiter again.
Tried to eat a chip. Mouth wouldn't cooperate. Nearly died. Wow I've missed this.
He did the "not my house dance." Apparently it involves spreading cereal on the floor and then grinding into the carpet in bare feet while singing "not my house" over and over and dancing.
She's gone now. Left with the wind like a majestic leaf that just rides the invisible current to locations unknown. And dude, her friends were really hot.
no one was sober enough to set up jenga so we just threw the pieces at the last person to drink
Kinda sad when you get home on a Sunday morning and the paper guy HAND DELIVERS the newspaper to you...,
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
I'm just chillin on the bathroom floor
Haha oh no
The bathroom floor is like my second bedroom on the weekends
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
When she saw "buy condoms" on my to do list she figured out pretty quick we were breaking up.
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