Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
I saw your purple underwear in the road this morning.
Silently passing ghastly beer farts as I move around the bridal department at Tiffany's. Call it my contribution to the holiday spirit.
Dude they are all farmers and I'm pretty sure there's a prostitute here.
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
Today's work quote "if I looked like you, I'd be sitting on everyones face"
Omg I'm puking right now and then sneezed four times in a row. You don't know pain til this happens to you.
I don't care how hot she is, her cat has pissed on me twice.
In all fairness that 65 year old man looked 23 in club lighting so you can fuck right off
I left her alone for a few minutes and she's already using a guy on his hands and knees as a chair while another guy is serving her margaritas.
As for the other mouse...I don't have any mouse traps so I put a Jell-O shot on the ground. Party hard little dude.
Officially spring today. First sighting of loud-ass Steller Jay on the balcony.
Swear on my life the dude next to us just ordered a pizza and I will fight to the death for a slice
The thing I'm gonna miss about him is his dick.
Randomize
