yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.
Just remembered I hit myself in the face with a bottle then did the nose test and decided I was still good. Don't think anyone noticed.
So drunk. Washed my hair un pancheros sink cus I was so hot.
I don't think I'd trust a marching band with trampolines to not cause serious damage to themselves/ property.
she never specifically said NOT to fuck her boyfriend so technically we can still be best friends
i vomited out of my nose in three different houses so far, i will be back for my boots tomorrow
dude she got out of bed and definitely took a shit then checked her stomach out in the mirror and whispered "well that probably took off five pounds"
Reasonably certain my seventh grade teacher is encouraging me to drop acid on twitter
He was the highest I've ever seen. Almost had him convinced there are only three colors in the rainbow...
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
Oh god theyre drunkenly throwing knifes now, definitely the best movie I've worked on
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
You faceplanted on the railroad tracks and when I tried to tell you to get up, you told me you were "taking a quick breather"
Left him blackout in the cab, gave 20$ to the cabbie and said drive until the meter said he wasn't getting a tip.
Bangkok has him now.
Randomize