they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
He just seriously used the word "skeet." Can we please find another way to get weed?
No. Take one for the team.
just learned how to wash a penis. thank you nursing school for getting me the most action i've had in months.
trying to figure out who visited the hillshire farms website enough for it to be in my top sites.
dude, when you're random girl from last night came down the stairs this morning she fell all the way down. I laughed. She just walked out. I hope shes ok. Tell her I give her a 10 for that landing though.
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
He told me I couldn't drink an unopened bottle of water he had in his room because that was his emergency bong water
I saw you try to drink out of a soda machine at taco bell, don't worry about judging
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
Just so we're clear. I'm still making jello shots and bringing them to the bar in my purse. I don't care if its half off margaritas. Don't want anyone thirsty
I would have screamed and cried and bled and shit and then died. Fuck that guy.
Medically YOU CAN'T BE AN ALCOHOLIC TILL 25!!!!! WE GET 3 BONUS YEARS!!!!
Don't shower too much, need the shame to be fresh to get the best story
I will teach you the ways of the ho life, my little gay grasshopper.
found my cat trying to steal a lighter to hide away for himself. cat what are you doing. don't pocket my lighter.
Randomize
