wat bout pragnant strippers??
My life is like a Sweet Valley High book but with lots of alcohol.
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
That can be our thanksgiving, vodka and cornbread. Just like the pilgrims.
A lesson I learned in the hospital....when you masturbate while attached to a heart monitor, it scares the nurses a lot.
so exactly how many freshman chicks did i tell to call me "the tripod"?
Doing shrooms is fine until you get raped by curtains
My mom now keeps ice cubes on hand for my bong water. We may be able to work this relationship out.
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
I just had sex with the Sheriff's Deputy. You should call me.
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
we thought it would be safer to lock you in the car alone downtown than take you back home to pass out
I'm about to go get lunchables and alcohol. Take that adulthood
She woke up, peed in the sink and then passed out again, it's only 2 in the afternoon
Randomize
