Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
I just spilled my beer all over my laptop.. this is what i get for actually trying to do homework
we were so high we made up an elaborate backstory because we were paranoid about going into the wig shop w/o being serious wig shoppers
Have you ever seen an entire lecture hall fist pump? It's magical.
I just saw a van full of amish parents and their kids. Those cheating mother fuckers!
Eating a muffin with a knife and fork. Hangovers have hit a new low.
Showering in my swimsuit in hopes of getting the beer smell out.
I've got my wine, though it wasnt very good so I threw a sour patch kid in it
Apparently I'm the last girl he had sex with. That was over a month ago. If he can go that long without sex then he's clearly not the guy for me
He just sent me a picture of himself naked while cooking pancakes and he made the caption "bitchin' in the kitchen"
And after peeing my pants waiting outside for him, i proceeded to drop down and roll in the nearest puddle to pretend like i just ate shit when he arrived
You did a cartwheel, it was terrible.
I remember that cartwheel, it was okay.
Also my roomate used some of my condoms so she gave me her hummus. Great trade
Seriously if we go to rome ur fucking me into the sunset on a wrought iron balcony overlooking Vatican City
it was the most awkward makeout ever. it was record breaking really
...i feel like you have a lot of those.
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