Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
Get dressed up for her? please, I could shit my pants and she would still blow me
For a day that started with shitting my pants, things turned out fairly well.
two words: fractured penis. two more: emergency room.
You weren't lying about those ceramics students giving the best hand jobs.
Oh my god, I hid a wine bottle in my boot.
I found a lucrative side business - giving rides home to drunk oil executives. Very profitable.
There was definitely a significant amount of cookie dough in my bra
Dude you went around coming up behind people and whispering in their ears. I dont know what you said but they looked terrified when you left.
You know I ate twenty hot dogs in an hour once.
I am honestly so surprised you are a lesbian.
I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
No that one bar I got kicked out of got closed so that technically doesn't count
Pretty sure if we keep hanging out on Tuesdays there will be no whiskey left for the younger generations or the universe will implode....tomato tahmato
just licked the cheese off a burger. that high.
He’s perfect! He listens to Genesis during sex and has a VW bus!
You really are from the panhandle, aren’t you?
Randomize