I just masturbated at work. Does that make me a prostitute since i just technically got paid to have sex?
doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
he ran me a hot bath. i thought i was in a pot and was going to be eaten. i was strangely ok with this
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
It felt as i were a pad of butter melting onto a piece of toast.
Sex on acid. Try it. I thought we were fucking in outer space with fireworks inside a rocketship car. Best.
Sweet! It'll be a "that-minor-I-used-to-serve-alcohol-to-is-no-longer-a-minor" party!!!
He had the same tone in his voice and look in his eyes that he gets when he says UFOs aren't real.
I love her so much I can forgive her for wearing crocs
Nothing like casual arson to brighten your day
i think we sleep fucked last night...
may or may not have snorted a line of tums... wtf.
A true gentleman never tells. But yes, I did indeed get laid last night
Dude... this pee is not alleged
YOU SAT ON MY LAP!
Wuddup pee lap
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