funny how all you have to say is "i'm infertile" and boys are stoked on you
I've come to realize time passes slowest when I'm sitting in class, waiting for microwavable foods, working out, & giving head.
The boys in front of me put beer, red plastic cups, ping pong balls, lighterfluid, and twelve packs of pantyhose on the conveyor belt. Whatever drinking game they're playing, I want a part in.
I fell alseep but then some dude picked me up. Comforter and all stuck a blunt in my mouth and carried me back downstairs because "I wasn't done partying"
I hope the walls stop moving before my manager notices that i'm still drunk.
I had a guy present me his prison release form this morning as id
White grape blunt wraps are like the equivalent of a glass of wine in a tux.
We got security called on us. Apparently the wedding down the street didn't appreciate the trespassing or our loud as fuck rendition of We Are Young.
I feel like just to watch it, I need to be high. To understand it, I'd need enough drugs to kill an elephant.
No...this little piggys going to the bar
But college guys get to crossfade so there's that
No idea what that is
Like getting bent? When you drink and smoke together...
I'm 30 stop using your cool kids words
Also, don't forget your plan to die young at a shrooms-fueled orgy.
How I know we're old. Don knows the owner. The owner said 'How about some shots?' We said no thanks. He looked puzzled and came back later and said 'You know it's on the house?' We said 'Yeah, no thanks.'
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
Randomize
