YOU CAN MICROWAVE POPTARTS!?!??!
Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
I don't know how God could bestow someone that emotionally confused with such an awesome penis.
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
i can't remember the last friday i didn't spend in the foetal position
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
I woke up with no pants, someone elses shirt, but my new years crown still on. That is dedication.
YOU NEED TO STOP BLOWING DUDES ON MY COUCH AT MY PARTIES
YOU NEED TO STOP PROVIDING TEQUILA AT YOUR PARTIES
We had sex in the bathroom. Good sex. Toilet breaking sex.
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
Dude you're fine. You're 5 minutes away from your house and you're eating fig newtons
What kind of terrible faithless God would allow vodka and one ply toilet paper to coexist?
He propositioned me for a threesome once so yeah I'd say he has what it takes to run for public office
she brought her phone charger to the bar this bitch is ready to drink
What do you think would be the best way to remove a baby carrot from a vagina?
Randomize
