Only you could turn Mozart into a stripper song.
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
I just fucked a rockette. This would have been amazing a week ago.
I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
There is literally a guy in my class with a gallon of water and a trophy.
getting a black eye the first day of spring break really sets the tone for the rest of the week.
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
there is nothing ok with the fact that that was the 4th time i peed in the same parking ramp
The old guy next door tried to get me to go to his apartment for shots formoonshine. =-0
If that weren't so sketchy I would encourage it
Yeah it was almost as sketchy as a white panel van pulling up offering candy
Would it be crossing a line if I told him that I now know his girlfriend has a huge mole on her left ass cheek?
Dick. I'll go round and break his windows. I've been watching Sons of Anarchy on Netflix.
Also: that bruise on my leg where you left like 3 sets of teeth marks keeps getting run into the corners of desks and shit. And I can't even complain to anyone at work
Get the fuck in, we're going to Taco Bell.
I went with vodka instead of tequila tonight so I make better decisions. Fool proof plan.
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