Where are you?
In a non slutty way
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
How fortunate humanity is that it need not rely on the female orgasm for procreation
you dragged me by my throat over to the shots. this is a new level of alcoholism..
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
Woke up with his dick on the side of my face, it's like he passed out mid-mushroom stamp.
We were running down las vegas boulevard at 8:30 am with our beers cause we were late for our flight
Just remember that I named his dick Robo-cock before he got into the sheriff's department.
No, just kidding. But your faith in me to throw a lesbian bridal shower makes me think I an pull it off. To the LGBT bar!
Let's stay in this weekend and play drinking games to the Winter Olympics.
As long as we can drink anytime we see a stray dog, mafia looking Russian or double toilet.
He made me choke him and call him Papi..so all in all a good night.
Yeah, last night in the parking lot was hot. I'm sure whoever has the surveillance tapes thinks so too.
My mom just busted me rolling a blunt on her bathroom counter. ...all she said was fuck it it's Christmas
Is it weird that I'm smoking a cig on my back patio in a sports bra and underwear?
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
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