Oh no. He has the "I'm 30 years old and I just shit myself in public" face.
Just tried to put my sweatpants on backwards...the chances of passing my physics exam just went down about 100%.
Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
I just witnessed Grandma making her infamous daiquiris. Extraordinary.
The guys had to come into the bar bathroom and pep talk us all off the floor
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
Just stop talking to douche bags. How do you manage to attract every asshole within a 100 mile radius?
If i could answer that i wouldn't be so afraid to move to a more populated area
Be here at 9 and look fabulous. We have drag queens to impress.
We will go to karaoke
Okay, well, i'm covered in paint, haven't showered & have already been drinking, so if I fall on the floor in a blaze of depeche mode & beer tears, you can't pretend you don't know me
I need something for rope burns and an inner ear infection. Separate incidents, FYI..
Don't remember anything. Melissa just said I kept saying welcome to the bat cave
Naked and Afraid: Hangover edition
Knowing there are different types of spiders in different countries and regions makes me never want to travel.
Driving, getting head and talking to your boss on the phone is not a good combination. I nearly died
wait you fucked a guy who wears k-swiss? seriously?
I know, im living my 7th grade dream
Randomize
