Who did Billy Mays play for?
Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
I just opened up the mens room door to a dude pissing in the urinal and pointing at himself in the mirror
1. my parents still have sex. 2. being a screamer runs in the family. 3. so much so that i can tell what number of orgasms she's on. 4.so looks like i'm stuck outside a while
There are paw prints all over my ceiling.
I'll be accepting presents in the forms of drinks, drugs, and orgasms. So any or all of those will be fine.
Dude...I slept walked to the free condom bin in the lounge last night. I don't know why.
You never know true fear until you're on your period in a house full of white furniture.
I smoked a joint in the bathtub at 8 am then went back to bed
I'm naked on my couch and just ate a chip that was in my belly button.. my 20s have been weird.
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
Dick is the cure to depression. I'm almost positive. And cough syrup.
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
Randomize
