Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
I just heard a mom tell her toddler son "shut the fuck up. Don't ask me to buy you shit when i'm taking u to go see some fucking animals" welcome to the bronx.
she was so hung over that i had to hold her hair while she puked in a trash can in the middle of the student center as new freshman and their parents walked by.
you could never motorboat her...you'd have to motor-titanic her
You were with some girl. Your exs best friend. Your shirt was half undone and she was telling you to put your penis away. It wasn't out but you wanted to. Patron is your weaknes.
She gave me head while using a laptop on my stomach to go online. I've never seen a better feat of multitasking.
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
He peed off the roof and then we bonded it was beautiful
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
Of course I'm going to see her again. She had waterproof handcuffs in her shower.
then this guy just runs in screaming, "cant you see my daughter pissed herself???!!!" and that was the start of my 2016.
Current status: so high that I'm unable to have coherent conversation with my mom, but still knew that when my dad said "shpritzy white stuff" I understood that he was trying to think of "whipped cream."
That text took me 10 minutes.
You were throwing up into a trash can full of used condoms. I had to intervine.
Best neighbors ever! They found the guy ive been wanting as a booty call and got me invited to the party the guy was at and gave me alcohol so i could be tipsy when met him. im never moving.
Randomize