i hit her car. ill just send her a farmville gift in the morning. then it'll be alright.
guess you're going to miss out on a groin massage and a frosty vagina
i caught the condom in my mouth.. dont ask me how
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
There's a bachlorette party going on at the bowling alley, so we'll see who wins greatest shitshow tonight.
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
Don't be embarrassed its me, I've licked your taint.
There's a stripper getting there at 10 though so hopefully I'm out before the stripper gets there. I don't have time to deal with a stripper.
Did you ever hear the story about the time I did blow in a bar bathroom with the #1 ranked golfer in the world?
It was a strange night. I made out with his college roommate and said "do you care?" beforehand.
I imagine you as a cat holding your burrito with two paws and cutely eating it
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
oh, he’s out of jail btw. as of about 6pm. one of his customers bonded him out apparently lol
Like he really got a coke fiend to bond him out?
Randomize
