I can't sleep so instead I'm thinking of all the things I would love to do to you right now
That's weird, I usually just count sheep
I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
hey give me heads up if you're feeling vulnerable tomorrow night
The taxi driver was going on about how many drunk chicks want to sleep with him when he drives them home. Not sure if he was bragging or hinting
Hey, what did you end up doing with those ski goggles?
Anything is possible. I didn't even know I was wearing the toilet cover as a hat
I just used crown royal bags as pot holders...
Naked chocolate chip pancake making. I just spilled mix all over the place. My boobs are covered in flour. This is not going well.
Life is when you're laying naked in bed, eating Double Stuff Oreos with your boyfriend, blazed as fuck. Happy 4/20.
the girls would appreciate it if you invited over some drunk, single, straight men with low standards.
Randomize
