ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
those are the first brownies ive had since i was 13 that didnt have weed in them.
I've come to realize time passes slowest when I'm sitting in class, waiting for microwavable foods, working out, & giving head.
You could have chosen coming to fuck me over getting too hammered to drive. But you made your bed, and now you get to jack off alone in it.
The number of people who end up getting laid as a result of the cha cha slide....is terrible.
Let's just say I've never been so continually aware of my nipples before.
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
Can you think of a sexual word rhyming with snorkel?
You had a fry stuck to your face... Every five mins you would wake up, take a bite, put it back then fall asleep again...
My mom is selling her car. I'm secretly relieved I won't ever have to tell her about that time you puked in it
party devolved into two exes battling with Cal's tiki torches, and the lawn being set on fire kinda sorta and then we all hula'ed... hulaed?
Some guys phone started vibrating on the tv. I answered mine. That's how high I am.
but I'm still not sure how you became more and more fluent in Spanish the drunker you got
Her mom came in and passed out drunk on the floor next to us while she was riding me, "it's all good, she does this all the time" is what she said
I need to find a divorced guy with a boat and let my tits do the talking
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