Sometimes I wonder if we could be friends if we lived closer.
Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
Today at work while talking to my co-worker we both realized at the same time that last year I had a one night stand with his roommate and he was in the living room drinking coffee when I did the walk of shame. YAY.
i had the deer in headlights look when she walked in and i was digging in her hamper
it was all downhill after the free blackjack taco
The cop only confirmed I'm .22% Irish. Then I threw up on him.
the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
Turns out they use me as an example of What Not To Do at freshman orientation. My little brother told me.
Just threw up in the waiting room. I can't believe I have to switch dermatologists again.
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
Can you get winded from lip syncing? I don't know how Britney does it
I may have just got motorboated by a male stripper who told me I should be a porn star and not a vet student.
Randomize
