he is naked. in. my. bed. happiest day. of my. LIFE.
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
My suggestion that we all just smoke some weed was greeted with a uncomfrotable silence and a 'maybe later'. These are not our people
No more Raisinettes before sex. That's what happened. I just put it together
When you get home there will be live fish in the bathtub. I did not put live fish in the bathtub.
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
It might look like I curled my hair last night but it's just the jiz.
Btw. I have a sinus infection from doing cocaine in a portapotty at a Duran Duran concert. So, gimme a couple of days before y'all start the party.
It's Friday you fucking nerd of course I'm drunk.
i don't know what happened one minute im stumbling home drunk and the next im drinking pabst and smoking with a french guy ive never met named hugo.
We're sitting on the kitchen floor drinking and talking about mounting real light sabers to the dog's head.
We're going to watch the inauguration and fuck. Or fuck and watch the inauguration, I'm not picky, just get your ass over here by ten.
Randomize
