and then I told him he looked like the Gordon's Fisherman dude. I don't think he thought it was funny, because he 'forgot' to pay for my beer.
what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
she broke up with me and one of her excuses was constant soreness... should I be sad or proud?
You dislocated his arm and then bought him two shots to numb the pain while you pushed it back in
My date just wheeled me home in a shopping cart but it was normal
Umm... How do I tell my roommate someone shot a speargun through the wall? On a side note, cliff shot a speargun for the first time.
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
Gonna play a drinking game called drink til I feel my emotions. The things I do so I can be a therapist
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
just reached the point where my breast implants paid from themselves in free drinks.
Does being an adult mean drunkenly signing for your tax return from a foreign country? If so, I've reached adulthood.
Sorry I've been a slutty nightmare this week
Just wore the promise ring dad gave me freshman year of high school as a fake wedding band while I bought a pregnancy test. I think it's safe to say that's not what he had in mind with that gift 14 years ago.
He literally knows my vagina better then I do.
Randomize
