My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
So she said she wears a diaper when she's on her period and I'm not going to lie, I kind of want to see the diaper.
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
Urine might work for jellyfish stings, but we found out it doesn't work well for nose bleeds...
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
Well I squeegeed the puke off your arm at the gas station
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
Responsibility: Hiding your beer when your DWI clients who are out on bond come to talk to you at bars.
I just told him I want him to "take the reins". At least its festive sexting?
I'm gonna get drunk in the shower and yell at my parents during dinner. Have fun in Texas.
I heard from the downstairs bathroom "WHY CAN'T I WIPE MY ASS IN PEACE!" and a pisscrate of glass bottles breaking
My ex's new gf is pregnant and he is sterile, so 2016 is starting off well.
Remind me to tell you about this weekend with them. It was the least fun I have ever had drinking. And I have thrown up pork and beer through my nose on the side of the freeway.
all i know is that i woke up at 12:00 am in a shower with egg shell in my hair. i am 90% sure you are responsible.
Last night’s booty call turned into a cuddlefest. Get your game face on, we’re hunting dick tonight
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