If this place produced love children they would be born wearing Lilly Pullitzer with raging coke addictions.
I do regret it. But I can't unfuck her
how does Santa get into Hogwarts?
well, I suppose if I had to pick a penis to represent the american public, yours would be it
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
There was a picture of him proposing on the night stand and their dog watched, but I can't help myself, his dick is just so perfect.
He told me that if his bed could talk, it'd write a medical journal. Guess it's too late to worry about that now.
My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out.
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
I still have beer shits from last weekend. Dying from dysentary is a real threat at this point.
OUR DIABOLICAL SLUT PLAN HATH COMMENCED!
Speaking of church, everyone showed up to lunch in the dining hall in their Sunday best and I walk in looking homeless bc I just got out of bed. I hate this school.
LOOK, I was 19, and I made a lot of choices with my crotch which I'm weirdly proud of
Yes dear.
No one should have to go to work between Christmas and New Years, but here I am twirling in my office chair and putting Jack in my coffee like I’m back in college studying for finals.
Apparently I have a "problem" because I enjoy doing bong rips in the shower
Randomize