but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
Katie is reenacting me jizzing in her eye via emoticons...
Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention
Had her hockey skates on in the house. Whole floor is ruined.
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
Good news. Isn't krabs. Bad news. Not sure what it is. Worse news. Encouraged not to fuck till known. Great news getting laid tonight
A girl at the bar is wearing green body paint instead of a shirt. Where are you?!
My drunken abilities have only improved since college....I can navigate the streets of chicago like no ones business, do push-ups to hail a taxi and instantly become an mma fighter after 3 shots of hennessy
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
He said I could liberate his beef and all I could think about was how I don't eat veal for political reasons.
That's why you bone lesbian cage fighters and 45 year olds. To make life less boring.
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
Why did I see a weird snapchat of you barking at McDonald's last night?
I'm honestly just saving all my liver's power for when I die this weekend. that's how it works right
Nice. Make him jerk off and tape it. Send it to his woman. I also love that you had another skype date
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