your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
Don't pass out before midnight like you did last year. See how much your year sucked
dude she snuck out while I was still sleeping then was banging on the door 10 minutes later cuz her car was brokedown. how was I suppose to recognize her??
If your dick isn't up when i get home you're catching tonight.
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
You were such a shitshow...I was just standing in the kitchen eating my toaster strudel and you came in, whispered "you didn't see anything" and led him to the couch
he kept saying that we were in ian's fun time place and then continued to act like a dinosaur.
Definitely had a dick in my ass while watching the Seahawks win. Best NFC Championship game ever.
I'm still laying in bed cuz I don't feel like adulting yet
Do I have to cook for the potluck? Can I just bring a costco size bottle of Vodka?
You went after him with a sword while screaming “FAJITAS!”. And Todd was dressed as a Goth for some reason
Randomize
