Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
I know I said I wouldn't, but he told me I looked like Mila Kunis. Reasons not to fuck him, go.
After the Patriots lost I punched him in the face. But I still feel like that isn't a good reason to dump me.
Somehow ed fucked carrie while purposely not saying a single word to her all night. He just nodded and smiled.
Would it have been easier if he talked to her?
Yeah, but i bet him he couldn't do it. Now he gets a free taco bell combo of his choosing.
I mean nobody wants to admit they ate 9 cans of ravioli but i did and i am not ashamed of myself
Once you mention butt plugs, conversations always take a turn for the worst.
I can only use one eye at a time. And if I want to listen, I have to close both of them.
You just kept yelling and saying, "IM NOT GOING TO STOP YELLING UNTIL YOU TAKE THAT SHOT"
Okay well we need to be adults. We're gonna end up with diabetes or some shit.
I have poison ivy and a broken finger. Don't have a threesome in the woods.
Would I be a horrible mom if I got a babysitter at 6am so I could go get laid.
She abandoned me on the doorstep of her hostel. Turns out you can't bring one night stands into those places. Slept in a train station next to a tramp. He gave me chips. And didn't steal my shit while I slept. So I'm counting this one as a win
Would it defeat the purpose of a run if I ran to McDonalds?
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
Randomize
