first i yelled "you cant get it up?" and then in the middle of it i opened a Corona
I put cups full of chips next to every bed, couch, and toilet so that everyone could have a snack when they woke up....
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
I hope I take a shit on your face in your dreams tonight.
You gave me balls I gave you half a boob. Fair trade
It's embarrassing enough people in my life are aware of the ridiculous things that happen to me. I don't think we need to get the whole world involved.
I'm sorry that I didn't get belligerently drunk and did not put my penis on your neck again
I should have bailed a long time ago. I mean, he has a bible verse-a-day app next to his dick pics in his phone.
My head is just one big fuzz right now.. Its like someone replaced my brain with a teddy bear
You know you're too drunk when you start calling people out for unfollowing you on social networks.
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
The adults are the big ones right?
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
Shame is for Republicans.
Randomize