Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
Reason #57 I am going to fail the bar... it's Tuesday and i'm drunk at Toy Story 3.
Im rolling a blunt of encouragement for you to return to
Just gave my liver a good luck and I'm sorry speech
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
im In safeway buying a bottle of Ciroc in short shorts at 3:00 pm on a Monday, yeah I don't know either.
I was 100% done.. I used my vibrator while eating cold pizza. Shit was magical.
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
I'm no longer puke free since 2013 am I.
That awkward moment when you realize you've been secretly blackout dating someone for three months. Drunk me is in a committed relationship.
Yeah I knew you'd like him. He's emotionally and physically self destructive.
We would have so much to talk about!
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
Ran into my FWB on my walk of shame and went back to her place. Even my walk of shames are awesome!!!
He ate me out on a washing machine in the 24 hour laundromat. Whoever watches that security camera footage is getting a show!
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