also, made friends with this 75 year old millionaire Tony who likes to mosh. Don't ask.
I have no memory of puking on someone. Was he cute?
Tried to buy Xanax from my boss last night. Wrong Mike.
I still havent given him the valentines day card i got him. I feel like just writting...."sorry for the horrible blow job i gave u last night." and just giving it to him.
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
You were chewing up hot dogs and spitting them out
On a scale of one to america, how free are you this weekend?
The woman at the bus stop told me i smell delicious and asked if i wear cotton then proceeded to tell me about her shellfish allergy
she's drunk at 2 in the afternoon again. at least my mother is predictable.
So apparently I ended up throwing my clothes in the toilet after getting kicked out of TQ and ran around the neighborhood in my boxers. Works gonna suck hard once this hangover kicks in. Also: I lost a shoe so looks like flipflops for the rest of winter
He woke me up, handed me a ringing phone and said break up w her for me. That hung over.
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
you told the taxi driver your yeast infection was so bad you wanted to F a popsicle
one of my coworkers asked me if I was PMSing today...... excuse me sir, but it is none of your business as to what my uterus is or is not doing right now. fucker.
and yea, I'm PMSing.
Randomize
