She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
I just saw a woman point to her daughter and scream at her husband THIS IS YOUR GENES, THIS IS YOU.
She refers to my dick as princess Sarah... oddly I'm okay with that.
he was drinking cheap vodka with warm tap water and a packet of crystal light. if that's not an alcoholic then idk what is
I couldnt bring myself to steal alcohol from my dead grandma
The bartender just told me he would have me face down in his pillow by the end of the night. I hate when you make me go to gay clubs.
I refuse to have another spring break doomed by pregnancy.
You know how hard it is to play cool while not drowning and appreciating a pair of butts at the same time?
When he sent me a picture, I swear my vag frowned. That tiny.
so today, i decided to say "fuck it" to mental stability, take a klonopin and wear a blanket toga. New Girl is on Netflix, nothing could go wrong.
Everything is covered in gelatin and pam cooking spray. Jesus be a shield.
Is offering to blow your HR rep considered an ethics violation?
Finally fucked my buddy's mom!! We are both ten years older and for her it really shows but i hit it!!
Randomize
