You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
I asked what she wanted from Hawaii. She said a baby like Aaden from JK 8.
where am I supposed to find one of those?
There really should be an "avoid ghetto" option on my GPS.
I know you're trying to keep the moaning to a minimum but the banging on the wall is totally giving you away
I think god is proud of me so he is rewarding me in discounted wine
She thinks I should try and corrupt him and take his virginity. While I do love virgins, I'm a little too lazy to put in the corruption effort right now. That's a summer kinda job.
Well then sir I'll probably see you tomorrow after my class and at 3 with your clothes off. Sounds like a solid way to start the weekend to me
You know I ate twenty hot dogs in an hour once.
I am honestly so surprised you are a lesbian.
I have straight up perfected the art of amazing manicures with shaky-as-fuck adderall hands. Also, I'm way too proud of this.
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
I just spent 45 minutes and a really well-put together Power Point trying to convince her to use my dog as baby Jesus in her church's play.
PROBABLY?!! And here I was, about to buy you a glow-in-the-dark banana-flavored cock ring... Now I "probably" won't.
I need to go to St. Louis more often. The brides sorority sisters were practically fighting over me once they heard I work on Wall St.
Randomize
