these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries
My broken door handle makes it really inconvient for when i need to puke at red lights.
There are pictures of you on the shoulders of some old guy dressed as borat
You fell out of your barstool, I tried to help you but you said if I got any closer I'd be drinking my meals through a straw, So there you sat.
antibiotics and champagne: breakfast of champions
Shame?!? Shame only comes from getting naked in front of strangers and it not being awesome
I need an adult. someone more adult than my current state
Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?
Me saying I wish i was a better person + me pretending I don't want to fuck on my period = me lying
We walking to the game and some random guy came up to to me and yelled "hey you're the whiskey guy!" And then high fived me then walked away
I just brought her a lipstick taser. So just remember that the next time you get smart with her
Nothing is more confusing than dreaming about being chased by jets, then waking up with an erection.
It’s awful. They need to open the bars. I’m now trolling grocery stores looking for dick
Randomize
