well apparently i yelled MY VAGINA WAS ANNIHILATED and his whole family heard
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
It's barely 9 am & I've already had an ice cube IN my vagina
I left a care package of Jack Daniel's, pancake mix and porn in your apartment. Merry fucking Christmas.
trust me. coming from a bonafide dirtbag, this dude is up to shady shit
We exchanged snapchat usernames instead of numbers. Is that what America has come to?
These beer shits have taken over my entire life.
If I send Ben a tit pic but I do it while wearing a Tom Brady mask is that funny or creepy
like, is this a date?? I'm sitting on his couch drinking a juice box while he makes taquitos in sweat pants
He's giving me the absolute bare minimum amount of attention. Like whatever motherfucker, I've had like six super likes on tinder today
So will your sis find it a compliment if I tell her I lost out on some awesome dick to go to her bday dinner???
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
I wiped my ass with a McDonalds wrapper. I've hit an all time low. Sorry for my impatience
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
Can I use your boat
Also, what’s the deal with international water? Do they have signs out there like a city does or do I need a map?
WTH is going on? It’s the middle of the night
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