I just saw a hot homeless man
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
Just so we both are on the same page, I have no solid plans as to where I'll be sleeping tonight.
okay, I promise to stop paying strippers to hit you
At this point do you think buying mom a pot plant would be funny or highly inappropriate?
Hangover Status: I've been bedridden longer than that kid from The Secret Garden. It's not looking good.
The fact that I'm going to be living with you is starting to make me worry about my heatlh.
Ya that ship has sailed dude
You said you wanted to wrap his dick in a tortilla and make a spicy burrito. Let me just say, most girls don't have this hard of a time getting laid.
i wonder if cab drivers are trained in the art of delivering girls back to their dorms on Saturday mornings. because mine was so nice that he dropped me off at the back of my building so no one would see me.
I just want to pat him on the head, bake him some cookies, and reassure him that, someday, he will get laid.
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
I told her my blood type was O Positive and we started making out. Bio majors are weird.
We celebrated our relationship by shotgunning beers on his lawn in our underwear. I may have to marry this man...
He started me on Celexa. I think I feel like Bjork. Is that normal?
Like... my feet feel like little octopuses, and they want to swim to the next room.
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
Randomize
